June 10, 2011

Dreamer of the Day Time

"All people dream; but not equally. Those who dream by night in the dusty recess of their minds wake in the day to find that it was vanity. But the dreamers of the day are the dangerous people, for they may act their dream with open eyes to make it possible."

 - T.E. Lawrence 

Yes... Now what does this have to do with bacon? Keep reading.

The Bleedening first draft was completed yesterday @ 10am. A 97 page baby boy came out after a gruelling 15 hour labour where I just had to commit and finish. The producers want to take it to Banff this weekend for the big pitch-fest, hopefully baby finds a daddy with lots of money.

But I didn't get to go to the Nightmare Island 2 Premiere and I didn't get to schmooze with all my friends and peers in the industry. No. I stayed home in last night's pajamas, literally writhing on the floor, uncomfortable, looking for distractions, wanting sugar (of all things!), and then found myself getting into the birthing position. Seriously! It was like instinct came over me and my body just started doing it. I couldn't get comfortable without squatting over my computer (quite a sight you can imagine) or balancing the laptop upside down while on my back, legs apart to stimulate the creative chakras or something... desperately needing a hand to squeeze while I pushed the mutherfucker out. It was weird. Primal. Scary. And then sleep inevitably took over. At the crack of dawn I was back at it, slugging through.

"Why on Earth did I decide to become a writer?!? Why did you encourage me???"
 "Shut up and get it done! And I'll take you to Albert's. "

Woah ho ho! New life injected into me as the promise of BACON took me into the last legs of sanity to whip up a sub-par first draft ending. But it's done. And I'll tell you, for a mostly vegetarian with 3.5 hours of sleep, suffering from massive isolation... Bacon is delicious. It's horrible, I know. The shame of it all. But maybe a life needed to be sacrificed in order for a new one to enter the world.

And by noon I was at work, hobbling around in a dream-like state, letting my customers know that I'm sleep deprived and my facial recognition software is broken, so don't take it personally. They took very good care of me. And then I got to go home and curled up with Season 5 of the Gilmore Girls (thank you Angela).

So. I finished. I once again separated myself from the people who talk about it from the people who do it. And once you actually DO something, you realize why most people AVOID it. It is the hardest thing ever, whatever it is you chose to do.

1 comment

  1. Oh man, do I ever relate to this. I ask myself why I decided to become a writer on a daily basis while going through the birthing pains. But it's such sweet release when it's over, much better than the constant gnawing gutrot of procrastination, or worse, the treacherous void I call The Block... Good on ya, kid.


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